We are constantly changing, most times for the better. Now that it’s a new year and the start of a new decade, we may feel like we have to make New Year’s resolutions even if we don’t actually want to. We often get trapped into making these goals for ourselves that we aren’t actually passionate about. Everyone needs a goal in life, but creating those common New Years goals for yourself to make others happy, isn’t the way to do it.

We all love to be loved. Feeling accepted for who you are is something everyone wants, but changing yourself and doing things that aren’t you to make others like you more isn’t right. It might sound cliché, but the only way to get others to like you is to be yourself. If someone doesn’t like you as you are, then they aren’t worth your time. Surround yourself with people who love you as you are and don’t ask you to change.

Many people choose to try to lose weight and try to be healthier as a New Year’s resolution. It’s a good goal, but if you’re not doing it for yourself, then there is no point in doing it at all. You need to want it and put in the effort.

This year, my goal is to be more positive (very basic, I know). 2019 was a rough year for me, due to my brother leaving and my great aunt and uncle dying. I had panic attacks and ended up crying every other day because nothing seemed to be going right in my life. I was so tired of getting up early in the morning for school and work, I was just sick of everything life had thrown at me. I needed a break.

Thankfully, Christmas break came and a new year began. I told myself I was going to focus on myself more in 2020. I’m not going to burn myself out in order to make someone else’s life better. I’m going to do things for myself and not to please others, because if I burn myself out then I won’t be able to help anyone at all.

A New Year’s resolution is a goal you set for yourself in order to become the best possible version of you. The only approval you need is your own. Let 2020 be your year of confidence and self-acceptance. Love yourself as you are and don’t let anyone tell you that you aren’t good enough. Don’t change because someone else wants you to change. Change for yourself, be who you want to be and don’t let others control your life.